The HOW-TO's about
|If the bride and groom had sexual relations before the official marriage, this indicates that both of them had violated propriety and tradition. They did not venerate their deceased ancestors who are referred to in the term of "Phee" meaning spirit or ghost. The parents or elders of the bride will inform the ancestors of the groom about the couple's "Pid-Phee" behavior. To make the future better for the couple, the groom must apologize to the ancestors according to ritual:|
b) The amount of money given will total the same as flowers, joss-sticks, and candles.
c) The type of meat offered will be pork or chicken, depending on some ancestor's favorite food. Also, the side dishes should be cooked rice, whiskey, fruits, and desserts.
After the ornament arrangement is presented by the groom, it is taken to the spirit house or room where the ancestor spirits are accommodated. A prayer is spoken: "Mr.... and Miss.... have done wrong by violating customs and tradition. Their actions were disrespectful to our ancestors, please forgive them. Please accept them as our children. May your spirits protect all of us and grant us prosperity". After the worship and burning of joss-stick and candle is over, the whole party can ask the ancestors for permission to take the food presentation away to be enjoyed by the living.
2 "Soo Khor" Wedding:
|After a young couple fall in love each other and they make the decision to marry, the next step will be consultation among the parents or guardians of both bride and groom. Therefore, the groom's senior elders will approach, "soo", the bride's parents or guardians for approval and permission. It sounds like ... "Let me have her = "Khor".|
Ceremonial offerings presented by the groom to the bride's parents will be as follows:
a) Khaan Mun or Engagement Bowl full of fresh flowers with artistic decorations. The numbers of flowers must be an odd number.
b) Khaan Maak or Betel Bowl is another present to the bride's parents. The size of bowl or tray is a little bigger than Khaan Mun, however it is also decorated with fresh flowers. The presents will be two raw betel nuts, 12 silver leaves, 12 gold leaves, 12 copper leaves, two bags of rice seeds, two bags of white rice, two bags of beans, and two bags of sesame seeds.
c) Khaan Ngern Sinsord or Dowry Bowl is the most important container for it indicates how much he loves her, how much financial support he can offer the bride's parent or how much money the newly wed couple can use to establish their future family.
d) Bai Si Nom-Maew is a large tray 10-12 inches wide and holds banana leaves in cone shapes resembling cat-shaped blossoms, hence, Nom-Maew. The globe amaranth flower is used in the beautiful decoration to show eternal love for each other. Bai Si or Khow-Kwun (Khow = rice, Kwun = natural spirit) means a ceremony to restore a shaken spirit and calling for prosperity and happiness. Also in a Bai Si offering, there would be cooked rice, foods, dessert, fruits presented in odd numbers.
3 Northern Royal Family Wedding:
|At one time a splendorous ceremony for the former northern dynasty was performed. Now this ceremony is held for the wealthy high society. In addition to the "Dai Pook Mue" ceremony already described, a procession is included. This is the "Rot -Naam" or lustral water-pouring ceremony.|
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